Exciting New Post Aims to Gin Up Book Sales

With less than a week till the exciting official release date of the Complete Cul de Sac (May 6, 2014) it's time to start creating a big fuss in hopes that you, the credulous comics reader, will be caught unawares and part with $50-plus. Toward that end, I've been trying to cook up some unnecessary yet attractive extra material to offer you, the jaded consumer.  Oh boy!  I'm excited already, how about you?

THE MAP OF CUL DE SAC AND ADJACENT PLACES POSTER - The initial offering from the Cul de Sac Collection is this mostly-accurate map of almost everything mentioned in the comic strip, rendered with loving precision. You'll be lost without it! Collectors pay as much as $25 million for the original painting,* but you can have a printed poster of the same image for only pennies! $13.50, to be exact. You may notice a certain discrepancy, attitude-wise, in the image offered at the site. It may even appear sideways. This is easily remedied by rotating the whole thing clockwise. Rotating it counter-clockwise will result in an image that is upside down. This would be wholly unacceptable. Therefore, we've prepared a small pamphlet, profusely illustrated, entitled, "Turning My Cul de Sac and Adjacent Places Poster Around; How Can I  Do This?" The pamphlet, which comes with an Introduction by the Rev. Edwin Howland Blashfield on  the "Moral Sense: Do Cats Have It?" with a picture essay on Parisian Hootchie Girls, for only $13.50. Sorry, no sales to minors or the mentally unstable.