VARIOUS STUFF

Friday, March 7, 2008

Slowing Down

For some reason our internet connection has slowed down in the last few days. Images and stuff take forever to load; it's almost like back in the days of dial-up. At first I thought maybe it was me, maybe I'd suddenly developed super-powers and was moving real fast and everything just seemed slow to my super-reflexes because, you know, it's all about relativity, And that'd be a boon if I wanted to get ahead on my deadlines, which were especially brutal this week, and if I was the Flash I could draw enough strips to last through next Christmas. But it looks like it's just the internet being slow.

I don't think I'd pick super-speed as my super-power. I've always thought the ability to stay awake indefinitely would be the most useful power, or the ability to make someone's foot fall asleep by staring at it, which'd be a hoot at social gatherings. Whatever, the point I set out to make is that I'm not going to post anything real graphicky, with bells & whistles & funny drawings, until the connection gets a little more up to speed. So until then, please feel free to leave a message with a good joke.

5 comments:

  1. So this turtle gets mugged by a gang of snails.

    He's beat up pretty bad. The cops show up, and ask the wild-eyed turtle, "Do you remember anything about your attackers?"

    "I don't know," the turtle says. "It all happened so fast."

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  2. Why are women so bad at math?

    *Holds thumb and index finger apart 3 inches.*

    Because men keep telling us this is six inches.

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  3. Was chatting on the phone this morning with a customer, a woman of 70 whose house I work on. (Would simply call her "an elderly woman" — except she generally strikes me as younger than a lot of people half her age, like me.) We were talking schedule matters for a little project I'm supposed to start next week, as we've both just lost people yesterday — she a dear friend, I an older relative. Before she lets me go, she says, she has a joke for me, and proceeds to give me the great old bit about the fellow at the ball game whom somebody looking to score a better seat asks about the empty spot next to him. "Oh, that's my wife's seat," he says with a sad look, "You know she always used to come with me to see the game, before she passed away." "And now you come alone — no friend or family member who can come along in her place, I guess?' "No, no — I'm glad for one of them to join me of course. But they're all at the funeral."

    She cracks me up!

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  4. Oh, I'd definitely take superspeed. Get the projects done faster and then read more.

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  5. Thanks for all your jokes, they're greatly appreciated. Except for Mike, who barely even tried to make a joke.

    The most popular joke in our house the last few years is a knock-knock joke, and it's better heard than read. But it goes like this:

    Knock-knock.

    "Who's there?"

    "Interrupting cow."

    "Interrupting c-"

    "MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

    "-ow who?"

    Our internet connection seems ok for now, and in two weeks we're getting FIOS, whatever that is. I think it's like super-speed, and it just makes me tired.

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